Paper introduction

I attempted to model something similar to the sample paper that I read, but remain original as well. I tried to incorporate an introduction to the corruption of government and the topic of food security together. This is my current introduction:

Citizens of the United States of America are very fortunate. Blessed with a Constitution and permitted a Bill of Rights that guarantees the rights and freedoms of the American people, liberty is granted at nearly no cost. All that is required by the average citizen is to pay taxes, obey the law, and they are paid back with a democratic government that provides them with nearly every freedom imaginable. These freedoms include items that are taken for granted each and every day, such as the right to say whatever you please, to carry a firearm as protection, the right to purchase things, the right to work, to earn money, and to provide for ones family. American citizens are also provided with nutrition. Due to the freedom said democratic government bestows upon it’s people, food is everywhere. Food is available for extremely cheap prices and in tremendous abundances. It is also required to be available in safe, consumable form. Thanks to the U.S. Government, these are all guaranteed to the American people. Now turn the tables. Imagine having no idea who is in charge of your country. Imagine wondering whether the “government” of your nation even knows of your region’s existence. Imagine contemplating whether you were going to be able to eat on any given day, and worse, if your family would be able to eat. American citizens rarely deal with issues so severe, but in Sudan, it’s drastically common. Malnutrition and starvation are far too familiar concepts to Sudanese people. This can be largely traced to their government. The citizens of Sudan deserve to eat, and even more, they deserve to live.